There's no doubt about it.
Being with certain people makes me feel happy.
They fill me with the power of possibility.
They are bright, shiny and encouraging and I am a better person for knowing them.
It is also true that the opposite is apparent.
They may not even say anything that's obvious but their negativity wraps around like a thick blanket of fog.
The trick is to recognise them and stay as far away as possible.
You don't want anyone or anything disrupting you from your trajectory.
If you are really sensitive, I don't think you can just shut off and toughen up.
To do so would deaden your creativity.
People have been known to become really ill by being around toxic souls so you owe it to yourself to protect yourself.
You need to surround yourself with white light before you see them and wish them the best in your mind.
Deflect their negativity from you and above all don't ever buy into their passive aggressive power plays.
Luckily I have a lot of people around me who are light shiners.
My pupils are really amazing and of course my husband and some lovely friends ( some of whom are animals), who are treasures.
So I am blessed and all is well with the world.
This is an article from the Oprah Winfrey site which illustrates it in detail.
Some people bring unexpected lightness and comfort to your life.
They crackle with energy, practically electrify you with their presence.
And then there are those who leave you feeling stressed out.
Or guilty.
Or exhausted down to your very last molecule.
I call them energy vampires, and obnoxious or meek, they come in all forms.
The sob sister, for one, always considers herself the victim.
The world is always against her, and she'll recount every horrible thing that has happened to her, wallowing in every perceived slight.
The charmer is a constant talker or joke-teller who has to be the centre of attention.
The blamer, on the other hand, doles out endless servings of guilt.
And then there's the drama queen, the co-worker who claims she almost died from a high fever or the neighbour who lives in extremes of emotion—life is unbelievably good or horrifically bad.
No matter which type of energy vampire you're dealing with, you're allowed to walk away.
Many of us find this really hard to do.
We're afraid of being thought of as impolite; we don't want to offend people.
But there are plenty of ways to remove yourself from a killing conversation.
When leaving isn't an option, you can still maintain your energy level by making a few minor adjustments.
Recognize the Signs
One of the first things to do is to recognize when you're being drained, and that begins with tuning in to your physical reactions.
Is there a tightening in your chest when a certain person enters the conversation?
Do you feel tired when you hang up the phone after speaking with someone?
Does your head ache, or do you feel what I call "slimed" when another guest at a cocktail party starts talking to you?
Take a Deep Breath
The moment you feel zapped—or hemmed in, or stressed out—I recommend taking a breath.
Breathing is a wonderful way to centre yourself.
Just follow the breath and tell yourself that you know what's happening and you can deal with it.
It's important to remember our individual power.
I know from working with patients that we can lose it easily.
The minute somebody comes in who's bossy or blaming, we feel diminished and tense up.
If we can focus on the breath, or on an image of a striking sunset or a view from a mountaintop, the tension will drift away.
Use Your Energy You can also use some of your own subtle energy to counter the effects of an energy vampire.
Visualize a protective white light around you: an energy shield.
You can still hear the person who's yelling at you or blaming you or pushing herself into your sphere, but she won't cut into you so viscerally anymore.
You've created a buffer zone, where her negative influences can dissipate.
Set Boundaries
Setting boundaries is another way of protecting yourself; you draw a line saying, for instance,
"This is what I can do for you, and this is what I can't."
You don't have to convince the vampire of the rightness of your stance.
Getting defensive simply adds to the negative charge of the encounter.
You want to remain neutral.
When someone starts pushing your buttons, and you start sizzling inside, you've got to make the decision not to react.
Step Back
I also suggest you step back and think about what type of people aggravate you, because I believe that one law of energy is that we attract what we haven't yet worked out in ourselves.
If I'm a very angry person, I'll find myself surrounded by angry people.
By paying attention to the people who seem so draining, you might discover something you need to address.
It has been my experience that once you've worked through a particular issue, you're no longer worn out by that kind of energy vampire.
And the vampires, robbed of a source, move on to more easily drainable audiences.
Creative Quotes of the week
Surround yourself with positive people and you'll be a positive person.
Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher.
Keying into your creativity can make your heart and mind sing.
The key is to do it often.
Creativity classes available, Monday to Wednesday and Friday.
email jkeen@clear.net.nz
Phone 346-3435
To book special time out for yourself to make some lovely mosaics and paintings.
Great photos. Loved the last one!!
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