What am I doing creatively today?
I am trying to compose my 1666 daily word count towards my 'write a novel in a month' commitment, but so far I have not been able to because of constant interruptions.
I've had a dream, of writing my own book. Ever since I was a toddler in nappies cranking out my crayon filled mini-journals, in fact. It's been this quiet, little longing that has turned over the years into a gushing avalanche of full blown desire.
I have an accumulation of diaries, lecture notes, poetry, painting and mosaic making lesson plans, a mini thesis on the history of collage and assemblage and countless emails and letters to prove that I can write.
ra ra ra ...so what?
I have this huge personal collection of "How to Write' books.
I have a blog, a website, attend literary festivals, authors talks, writing retreats, read and buy other writers fiction and non-fiction , attend how to write workshops, read everything in sight from newspapers to literary magazines and writers blogs...
ra ra ra...so what?
I turn fifty next year and my dream has not materialised, my name is Janet Keen and I am a procrastination addict.
That's what! Here I am, outed and since I believe the first step on the road to recovery is to admit you have a problem to the whole world...
Here is a list of poisonous sentences the inner Iago pours inside my ear whenever I contemplate pitching my book ideas to publishing companies.
1. To be a writer is to live a life of constant rejection, you need to be prepared to plaster your wall with rejection slips, harden up.
2.Everyone wants to write a book, hardly anyone does, what makes you think you are any different? 3.What's the point of writing a book, you can never sell enough copies to make it worth your while.
4. The publishing industry is going through a massive change at the moment, even experienced writers aren't getting published, what chance does an unknown like you have?
5. Even when if you do get published, your writing won't be good enough to get noticed, join the queue to the slush pile or shreading machine, end of story.
All this inner turmoil has led me to do some extensive internet research about overcoming bad habits...
Watch out for some smiley solutions in tomorrow's blog post....
Please feel to tell me about any little, nagging creativity doubts you have because as we all know a problem shared is a problem doubled.
Peace of mind be with you.
Creativity quote of the day:
I cannot expect even my own art to provide all of the answers- only to hope that it keeps asking all the right questions.
Grace Hartigan
2 comments:
Janet, I am beset by the same fears but I must be ignorant because ignorance being bliss, I have submitted to publishers and been published in various genre with varying success. I don't know what to say to you, except don't consider the consequences of submitting because you will never know them until you do. And whatever happens you will have learnt something in the process. My feeling is that it will be something worthwhile and positive because you have worked so hard and with so much passion and heart.
The only writing I do are emails - letters to the people I love to talk to. One day too I would love to write a book - haven't begun yet but know I will if all goes well. You are all great inspirational women and it is wonderful to read your words. :)
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